Please, Don't Give Me Your Best.

As a teacher, I used to tell my students that they should always give me their best work, but I don’t anymore. That’s too much pressure. It’s also sends the wrong message. It says they should never be at ease. It says you must give your best away. Rather, I want my students to become their best.

They cannot form every letter they write perfectly. (They would never complete their work!) Did any of us actually work each problem on our tests twice before turning them in? Students cannot simultaneous focus on developing their reading fluency, accuracy, and comprehension in the same passage. Sure, they are capable of editing that paper one more time or studying for 5 more minutes, but where do we draw the line? When their attention span is completely gone? When then have done homework until bedtime? Until school and the pursuit of college application worthy endeavors has swallowed up their life so that they lose the joy of their youth in pursuit of future ambitions? When they become like us with their busy lives always moving but looking more like a hamster in a wheel than a stroll through Walden’s woods?

The giving of their best already means making choices as to what areas they will focus that effort on, while ignoring other areas. There will always be things that go left undone or done at a level that doesn’t meet the standard of their best. What I really want to say is, “What is the best effort you can give me within the boundaries of the time allotted for this specific task?” and then I want to make sure to change up the type of tasks I am giving my student to allow them to rest in different areas. Sort of like crop rotation for their bodies and brains. I try to alternate writing, reading, play, talking, standing, creating, etc. Give me your best handwriting on this task and then your most creative idea on the next task. What part of your best do I want you to focus on now?

At my job we have talked a lot in the past year about the Greek word schole’ where we get the word school. It means leisure. (Mind blown!) We grow the most when we are both working and at leisure as opposed to franticly checking things off a to-do list. (Example: reading a great book in a comfy chair.) Growth is both uncomfortable and thrilling. Our lives should be filled with both hard work and deep contentment.

Leisure and work are not opposites. Prioritizing where I focus my efforts and making room for rest and reflection will make me a more whole person and ultimately improve what my best actually is.

I need to learn to model this in my own life.

I can’t clean my house until it is spotless. Not only do I not know how to do that, but I don’t have the time. More importantly, it doesn’t need to be perfect. I need to clean the most crucial areas of my house to the best of my ability in the time I have allotted.

I cannot make the most amazing lesson plans for every lesson that differentiates instruction to meet the needs of every student. But I can wisely set aside an appropriate amount of time for that task and make my plans a little better than they were last year while keeping this year’s students in mind.

I can’t cook elaborate dinners every night, serve in ministry regularly, be a great wife, mother, sister, friend, etc. to everyone all the time. I can maybe do one of those things at a time, and probably anything I do could be better with more time and effort.

We all need to have time where we aren’t giving our best so we can become our best. We are becoming our best selves when we engage in relaxing activity that stirs our souls. Maybe that is reading good books, taking long walks, dreaming big dreams, praying, creating art, or spending time with loved ones.

No where in my vision of my best self am I cleaning a toilet. My desire to lead an orderly life that is low on stress requires me to set aside time to clean and organize my life for the purpose of  freeing up the rest of my life to be filled with the things that truly matter. If I spend hours looking for lost items or I don’t stick to a budget and I’m too broke to enjoy the money I earn, then I limit what I can do with my life. I need to see those tasks of drudgery as the tools that enable me to lead a fulfilled life and limit them from spilling out all over and becoming my entire life.

I cannot give you my best in everything. I should not give you my best in everything.  And, please, don’t think you need to give me your best either.